Monday, August 4, 2008

The Vampire Lady

My HOA drama is far from over.

This morning, as I was getting into my car, which I've been parking in a neighborhood across the street, I saw the lady who I refer to as the Vampire Lady.

The bitch is like in her later forties, has fangs caps on her teeth and purple hair. She's a stay-at-home mom and home schools her son. She's also a member of the HOA. She's one of those people who act like they own the neighborhood, but in reality she just has no life.

For a "Vampire", you'd think that Halloween is like her favorite holiday. She decorates her house and sits out with a table and everything, so you think you're gonna get something good but she gives the crappiest shit for Halloween.

All smoke and no mirrors, you know what I mean?

Anyways, that's all really besides the point.

Long story short, that fucking bitch had the fucking audacity to follow me to my car this morning.

As I got into my car, I saw her jump out from behind a bush. She gave me a look of disgusted and I gave her a look of I don't-give-a-fuck and the finger, and I drove off.

I saw her run to someones house in that neighborhood, so I'm assuming she probably wants the neighborhood to know that people who don't live there are parking on their lot, but that street doesn't have an HOA. It's county property, so you're out of luck bitch.

I can only imagine what the neighbors face must've been like when they opened the door and saw a middle aged woman with a painted white face, purple hair and fangs ranting on about people not paying their HOA fees parking in the neighborhood at 9:30 in the morning. Kinda hard to take her seriously, I can imagine.

I'm not sure what the Vampire Lady plans to do, but whatever move she tries to make from here on out is more then likely illegal. I'm not parking in the condo lot. I'm on county grounds now, so technically I should be safe.

I knew I wasn't crazy. They were watching me, just like I said.

This shit is far from over...

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