Friday, April 24, 2009

Fun on Craigslist: Who Wants to Be My Boy Toy? Part II

After 3 long weeks, here is the 2nd installment of Who Wants to be My Boy Toy?:

Who wants to be my boy toy? - w4m - 45 (Philly)

Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-02-26, 1:51PM EST

I am an older woman who is in much need of a young man to satisfy my sexual desires.

I'm looking for men between the age of 20-30 and with an open mind for a good romp in the sheets.

I am an older attractive white woman. 45 years old. This is the first time I've ever done anything like this, so please bear with me. xoxo

  • Location: Philly
Victim #1:
Hey I saw your ad on craigslist and I am interested in hooking up
I am 23 y/o, 5'7", I have black hair, dark brown eyes, slender build with abs, and an average length, really thick girth, cut cock. I am drug and disease free. I am clean, safe, and sane. I can cum multiple times and I do have stamina (in and out of bed), and I love to try new things. I do have a slightly dominant side. I would love to meet and enjoy you asap.
I can come to you or we can do car dates and we MUST BE DISCREET.
I live in NE Philly.

I would love to give you that thick hard cock. I would love to pleasure you every day and every night and make sure that you are sexually satisfied and fulfilled.

My Reply:
Oh My...

You sound quite thrilling...

Discretion is definitely a BIG thing for me as I am still married to that old, impotenet, wrinkled, moron.

I swear, if the old bastard wasn't so loaded, I would've left his sorry herpes infested ass years ago.

It's been about 3 years since I've had my hairy, dry pussy stuffed by a large and swollen egg roll, so I am definitely ready. You're "slightly dominant side" may be a bit of a problem though.

There can only be one bitch in this game dear, and I'm afraid that that's going to have to be your role, not mine.

His Reply: at is fine I will not be dominant and I will fuck you the way you want to be fucked and I will make you cum hard by eating you out

Victim #2:
What's up? I'm 23, good looking and in great shape and have always fantasized about being an older woman's boy toy to be used how she pleases. I'm clean, d/d free, relaxed and respectful, and am very open minded. Let me know if you are interested!

My Reply:
Honey, if I wanted a respectful man, I'd fuck my husband.

I'm interested in young wild buck who will fuck me silly and help me clear out the old bat cave of cobwebs.
Victim #3:
20. Kid dynamite. I have a heart for older women.

My Reply:
You are absolutely adorable... Are you into role playing by any chance?

After all, I am old enough to be your mommy... Someones been a bad boy... You need a spanking... You naughty, naughty child...

With your naughty, naughty, sexual desires... I'm going to spank you really nice and hard.

Then I'm going to make you suck on my battered and beaten clitoral lips. I want to grab you hard penile shaft and ram it into the back of my throat. Then I'll let you get behind my dusty old cook and ram that cock in there like a brand new jack hammer.

Hope you don't mind the smell of moth balls as it has been quite a while since I've put the ol' gal to use. She's like a retired pony on its last leg before it gets shot. But I still got it, and I'm gonna give it to you good.

Don't be frightened by the mouse trap thats been set into my vagina. Its been set up there to collect semen.

His Reply:
I'm naughty but bite back.

Pics and details. I'm always bad

My Reply:
oh no sweety, there is no biting mommy.... Or mommy is going to have to bite you itty bitty testicles as punishment.
I'm going to tie you up, naughty boy, and pour honey all over you...

You like that huh?
Then I'm going to put ice cream sparkles all over your body and let the dog come and lick it all off of you.

MMMMM, dont you want to be a naughty boy for mommy?

His Reply:
bite my testicles as punishment, cover them in honey and bite down hard.

I'll be a naughty boy for mommy. Just name a time and place
Victim #4:
hey there,

saw your posting on craigslist. 30/s/w/m here from the philadelphia surburbs. love older woman, and very eager to please. would love to romp those sheets with you.

get back to me if interested, i have pics to share ;) hope to hear from you

My Reply:
mmm you want to romp in the sheets with me...

you are gonna love the this old nasty cunt brings you penile ecstasy.

its been so long since since my menstruating cunt has had its fill. hope u don't mind the blood or the smell but I'm soon to be reaching menopause and I want to enjoy every menstrual cycle till my eggs all dry up.

when are u available to meet up?

Vitctim #5:
U In Luck I'm Looking to be a boy toy call my phonne if u like wat u c

My Reply:
I've never had black penis before... my husband would kill me if he ever woke up from his coma. he told me many times in the past that he could forgive me for infidelity as long as it wasn't with a negro (excuse the term but he's really old and it's probably safe to assume that he is racist.)

Personally, I think that his insecurities stem from that ever long rumor that black men have bigger penile members (my husband is only about 5inches on his best days)

I think that a young buck like you could possibly be exactly what this ol' gal needs to climax and get some of those old cockroaches out of the old bat cave. You could be my young stallion and I could be your master. I could tie you up and whip you until you became tamed and called me your Master.

I'd like to spoil you and have you do things to me that no men has ever done before. I've always had a fetish for sticking foreign objects into my vaginal cake but as of yet, I've found no one else to share that hobby with me.

I know that sex is a lot different now then when I was younger in terms of people being more open to try new things, so I'd love to do a lot of new experimental things with you. I've considered asphyxiation, too. What do you think?

Victim #6:
I attached my pic if you like hit me back with yours....I've never done this either but its an incredible fantasy of mine.....we could have alot of fun......I love using my tongue....


My Reply:
No one even said that I've never done this before... In fact, I do it all the time. This is the rave of the century. My son is about your age. It was he who suggested that I start looking for new sexual partners on the internet, now that my husband is in a coma.

I once had this pleasant little Vietnamese boy who was perhaps just barely 19-years-old. He lived and shared my bed for almost a month until he discovered my husband bedroom and saw him lying there on his respirator. (This was before the coma).

Ohhh how I miss my little Phuc.... Anyways, enough about that

Tell me about yourself... What kind of things are you into?

Victim #7:
I would love to be your boy toy. 36 yeord man. I am married and need more I do not need to change my life I want to feel in gaps that have become emptied. I am very oral by the way, if you know what I mean. ;) This is the first time i am reading this so i can understand you.

Best Wishes

My Reply:
i am also married to an older and useless bag of worthless, impotent man. just looking at him naked makes me want to hurl. hes is quite unattractive though his bank statement is quite lovely. and hes got more decaying flesh rotting off of his stench filled body then the crypt keeper.

I suck his impotent dick once a month just because I hope that eventually one of those times he'll die from a heart attack. Enough about him. I havent had sex in my old saggy vagina in quite some time so I'm looking forward to some nicer penis with out all the elephant wrinkles... could you be that one to satisfy me?

His Reply:
I can see your dilemma. I would love to be the one to satisfy you if you give me a chance. As I said before I am so very oral. I would love to make you cum with my tongue. You said this is the first time you are writing and this is the first time I am reading an ad. SO I think we can be on the same page. I think there is no need for us to change our lives but to help eachother find what we are missing. There are so many things in our lives that this arrangement maybe really good for both. Lets findout where it leads. hope to hear from you soon.

Best WIshes

My Reply:
I would just like to inform my that my husband found out about our little rendezvous plans thanks to that fucking Asian slut-of-a-whore housekeeper of mine. Who knew she could actually read English? Shes' been so spiteful ever since she found out that $5 a day is way below the minimum wage. I ought to have that fucking bitch deported.

But to hell with that. On the plus side, that old wrinkled bastard would like to join in out fun, or rather he's interested in having relations with you as I watch.

So when should we meet?
Victim #8:
36 old goodlooking greek i live in atlantic city i can host.. 2 eat ur pussy n suck ur hornny wet clit..i'll fuck ur clit with my lips and make cum n cum in my face..
love unshave pussy with fat wet pussy lips and hard clit...hung greek cock and big shooter 4 u baby
please call me 215 499 ****.. or just txt me 4 pic

My Reply:
lovely because I am extremely unshaven and have a wild bush like the amazon...
you can be my little pet turtle and i will call you long john dung. i know that you would love a taste of this old coots vaginal scabies and lice. your a little dirty boy and i'm gonna spank your little dirty ass.

His Reply:
its morning.. i love sex in morning..
i like ur email its soooo sexy just like ur wet dick soooo hard now ..thinking of u
sitting on my tongue licking ur clit and fingers in side ur horny pussy..and ur
cuming in my face 4 ever...
please tel me u r going to call 2nit..i love darty phone sex....
im working today..from 12;00 to 8;00 pm..
let me know what time u going to call me ..must be after 8;00 pm...
i live alon a im single n safe..
your greek lover..
john xoxo

My Reply:
I want to ride you like a pony train and shoot grape flavored jolly ranchers out my pussy into your mouth. maybe skittles so you can tell people that you've tasted the rainbow.

I will sit on ur face and u can eat my dripping wet, gonorrhea infected clit until I squirt my syphilis juice in your eyeball.

you can finger me until I orgasm orange anal secretions..

His Reply:
can u call me..

I think there may be another installment but who knows. I still have a lot of emails that I either didn't read or haven't had a chance to post the replies.

All the same, I'll propably start doing these posting at least once a month now that I have internet at home again. And I'm sure they will be even more interesting since chances are, I'll be slightly inebriated, hehe.

Those are always the best...

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