Monday, February 16, 2009

Not Another Crappy Valentines Day? WTF?

I'm not really sure where to start this one...

There I was, minding my own business, working on Valentine's Day when Cornholio's sister come in and tells me that there's a package waiting for me at the door.

My first thought was that one of my angry readers found out where I worked and decided to maybe try to kill me by sending me anthrax or a bomb because I had probably pushed the whole "socially acceptable racism" thing way past the limit and pissed off a bunch of Angry Muslims.

As it turned out, the package was from Cornholio, which actually scared me even more because I figured that he was probably trying to retaliate for the incident when I peed in his chicken 3 years ago.

Imagine my surprised when I opened the box and it was.... Tulips?

No bomb... no death threat... no deadly disease.... What the hell is going on here?

We're all going to die, aren't we? Hell has finally frozen over!

More importantly, how the hell am I suppose be angry on Valentine's Day when he goes and ruins it by doing something nice? What an Asshole! LOL

Now I'm angry because he made me happy for once by doing something so ridiculously nice.

Happy blogs don't make for good blogging so now I'm pissed off that he did something nice because now I can't be angry like I wanted to be, which in turn does make me angry so in the end it all kinda works out.

Kinda twisted, ain't it?

Well, you know me....


Anonymous said...

you are so sad. i really feel sorry for you. you dont even give yourself a chance to be happy over something nice. i am a big fan of yours and maybe your man sees that you deserve the flowers and yet you cant accept a act of kindness done to you. you are so messed up in the head that all you know is being a bitch or fucked up....which at times aint bad. i hope you had a happy valentines day.

Anonymous said...

well, well, I beleive their is still hope for you. Bring down the shield, would you? There's a soft spot there. I LOVE YOU