"Trying to figure out a woman is like trying to hit the lottery... Only one in a million will hit the jackpot" - Angry Girlfriend
Does that even make any sense?
Oh well... Who really gives a shit...
You like how I tried to get all Confucius on your ass!
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Honey Honestly: What's Your Number?
We’ve all been there. You’re sitting there on the couch with your significant other, whom at this point, you probably haven’t been dating for anymore then 3 months, when suddenly they turn to you and ask, “So honey, how many people have you slept with?”
No one really wants to answer this question truthfully, and the person who asked the question more then likely doesn’t want a truthful answer, and yet, for some unknown reason this question always seems to pop up at some point in a relationship.
So how do you answer? Well, if you’re anything like me, you lie. My number has stayed at 6 for… well… let’s just say a long time. Funny thing about it is that the number 6 seems to be the standard number for most women.
Every woman that I know that does have a higher number then 6, will always tell her current partner that he is number 6. Hell, I’ll be damned if I ratted them out. After all, I’m a liar, too! (Not that I’ve been overly promiscuous, but some people just didn’t count, hehe).
But what I don’t get is why is it that when a guy is asked about his number, the answer is always something like, “I can’t remember” or some ridiculously high number which of course is, 99% of the time, a flat out lie.
Woman tend to knock off a few people from their list because “it didn’t count” or because they don’t like to seem promiscuous, but men tend to exaggerate because a higher number makes them seem more macho to their male buddies who of course are also lying.
I don’t think these men get that woman don’t like promiscuous men anymore then men like promiscuous woman. A whore is a whore, regardless of gender, and I don’t see shit in a guy who claims to have a high number of sexual partners. It’s actually a major turn-off to most women. So even if you happen to be one of those guys who really does have a ridiculously high number, unless you were or are currently a porn star, I suggest you start lying about you’re number, too!
I don’t normally advocate lying in a relationship but in this case, it’s probably the better option because even though you’re partner may ask you the question, it doesn’t mean that they necessarily want hear the truth.
If you happen to be one of those people who really feels the need to figure out the truth, here’s a good way to get a more accurate estimate of how many past lovers your current boy/girlfriend has had:
*To get a more accurate estimate number for a female, multiply whatever number of sexual partners she claims to have had by 2. (Ex. If she claims 3, then it’s more likely 6. If she claims 6, then it’s more likely 12, etc.)
*To get a more accurate estimate number for a male, divide whatever number of sexual partners he claims to have had by 3. (Ex. If he claims 20, then it’s more likely 6. If he claims 36, then it’s more likely 12, etc.)
*Note: This formula does not apply to people who have worked in the following industries: porn, whore houses, escorts, strippers, prostitutes, Hollywood actors and actresses and Hugh Hefner.
Should your partner ever happen to ask you who has been the best lover you’ve had, the answer should always be, “Are you kidding me? You, honey. You’re the best”. I don’t care if your current sexual partner is like a cold dead fish in the sack. The answer to the question should always be the person you’re currently with, that is unless you’re on a suicide mission.
Why do people even bother to ask these damn questions? Because we’re all in some way a little bit narcissistic and egocentric. We all want to hear that we are the best fuck, cocksucker, carpet-muncher, etc., even if it is a lie.
Of course, I just happen to know that I am very good at what I do, and I don’t need any reassurance about it. I guess I’m just full of myself. ;)
No one really wants to answer this question truthfully, and the person who asked the question more then likely doesn’t want a truthful answer, and yet, for some unknown reason this question always seems to pop up at some point in a relationship.
So how do you answer? Well, if you’re anything like me, you lie. My number has stayed at 6 for… well… let’s just say a long time. Funny thing about it is that the number 6 seems to be the standard number for most women.
Every woman that I know that does have a higher number then 6, will always tell her current partner that he is number 6. Hell, I’ll be damned if I ratted them out. After all, I’m a liar, too! (Not that I’ve been overly promiscuous, but some people just didn’t count, hehe).
But what I don’t get is why is it that when a guy is asked about his number, the answer is always something like, “I can’t remember” or some ridiculously high number which of course is, 99% of the time, a flat out lie.
Woman tend to knock off a few people from their list because “it didn’t count” or because they don’t like to seem promiscuous, but men tend to exaggerate because a higher number makes them seem more macho to their male buddies who of course are also lying.
I don’t think these men get that woman don’t like promiscuous men anymore then men like promiscuous woman. A whore is a whore, regardless of gender, and I don’t see shit in a guy who claims to have a high number of sexual partners. It’s actually a major turn-off to most women. So even if you happen to be one of those guys who really does have a ridiculously high number, unless you were or are currently a porn star, I suggest you start lying about you’re number, too!
I don’t normally advocate lying in a relationship but in this case, it’s probably the better option because even though you’re partner may ask you the question, it doesn’t mean that they necessarily want hear the truth.
If you happen to be one of those people who really feels the need to figure out the truth, here’s a good way to get a more accurate estimate of how many past lovers your current boy/girlfriend has had:
*To get a more accurate estimate number for a female, multiply whatever number of sexual partners she claims to have had by 2. (Ex. If she claims 3, then it’s more likely 6. If she claims 6, then it’s more likely 12, etc.)
*To get a more accurate estimate number for a male, divide whatever number of sexual partners he claims to have had by 3. (Ex. If he claims 20, then it’s more likely 6. If he claims 36, then it’s more likely 12, etc.)
*Note: This formula does not apply to people who have worked in the following industries: porn, whore houses, escorts, strippers, prostitutes, Hollywood actors and actresses and Hugh Hefner.
Should your partner ever happen to ask you who has been the best lover you’ve had, the answer should always be, “Are you kidding me? You, honey. You’re the best”. I don’t care if your current sexual partner is like a cold dead fish in the sack. The answer to the question should always be the person you’re currently with, that is unless you’re on a suicide mission.
Why do people even bother to ask these damn questions? Because we’re all in some way a little bit narcissistic and egocentric. We all want to hear that we are the best fuck, cocksucker, carpet-muncher, etc., even if it is a lie.
Of course, I just happen to know that I am very good at what I do, and I don’t need any reassurance about it. I guess I’m just full of myself. ;)
Friday, September 21, 2007
The Importance of Masturbation
Masturbation has always been a subject that people find uncomfortable. Generally speaking, I believe that this is because people feel ashamed in admitting that they actually took the time to sexually pleasure themselves. There are also some people who find it uncomfortable because as children, they were taught that masturbation was shameful and dirty.
Masturbation should not be considered shameful or dirty, rather it should be taught as a part of normal human sexuality.
Some people might be shocked to learn that children as young as 2-years-old begin to experiment with masturbation. They might not realize what they are doing at the moment, but they know that it makes them feel good which is why they continue to do it. That is until the parent catches onto the behavior and reprimands them for doing it.
This is a bad approach since by reprimanding the child it will only teach them to be ashamed and uncomfortable of their bodies. It is better to explain to the child that that kind of behavior should only be done in the privacy of their bedrooms as opposed to them doing it in public.
This way, they won’t feel ashamed of themselves, and will know that it is okay as long as it’s done in private.
The first time I can recall masturbating was when I was about 3-years-old. I remember grinding with my cabbage patch and how good it felt. I did this pretty often and it was all innocent. I really didn’t have much of a concept about sexual intercourse. At that age, you don’t really think that way. I was just exploring the tingly feeling that I had down there.
To this day, I don’t see any shame in masturbation. It’s safe, fun and educational.
It’s safe because there are no risks of pregnancy or STD’s and as a bonus, if you happen to get drunk and masturbate, there’s no morning after regrets about who you slept with. Don’t believe that old wives tale. Believe me; you won’t go blind from frequent masturbation. If that were true, I would’ve been blind years ago and I still have 20/20 vision.
It’s fun because you can always guarantee yourself an orgasm, unlike your boyfriend, husband, or that guy you met at the bar last night. Enough said.
Most importantly it’s educational since you’re not only learning your sexual likes and dislikes, but you’re also teaching yourself how to climax, which believe it or not, quite a few woman don’t know how to do.
There are a lot of woman out there who are uncomfortable at the thought, let alone at the actual act of masturbating. For all of those women who feel or think this way I would say, “How can you possibly expect for a man to give you an orgasm if you can’t even give yourself and orgasm?”
Just think about it.
It would put quite a damper on your sex life if you had to fake an orgasm every time you had sex. Sex might feel good without an orgasm, but it’s great with an orgasm. Granted you’d never know what you’re missing if you never had it, but why wouldn’t you want to do something that could make something else even better?
For those women out there who have been contemplating masturbation but haven’t quite worked up the nerve to actually do it, I’d say go for it. After all, what do have to lose?
For those women who are inexperienced at masturbating, I would suggest learning how to climax by hand first before moving onto the toys. This is because it’s a lot harder to learn how to masturbate by hand after using toys to do the job. You tend to become dependant of the toys and won’t learn anything this way. Remember that the whole purpose for masturbation is to learn how to achieve an orgasm by yourself.
Unlike men who are visually stimulated, woman can usually imagine a scenario that will get them off. That’s not to day that men can’t do the same, but they tend to be more visually stimulated by nature and will take longer to climax without the help of a visual aide.
Use any fantasy that you might have (and don’t say you don’t have one because we all do), go lie down and let your imagination and fingers do the work. Stimulation to the clitoris is key to achieving an orgasm. A very common method for masturbation is the “Stop and Go”, which men tend to do frequently. The “Stop and Go” is when you begin to masturbate and when you feel close to orgasm, you stop for a little while, then resume once again. For men, this serves two purposes:
1. It allows them to learn how to control their penis from reaching orgasm/ejaculation too quickly.
2. It makes the orgasm even stronger which in turn enhances the pleasure.
As woman, there’s no such thing as reaching an orgasm to quick (you got to love that part of the double standard), therefore only reason number two of the “Stop and Go” applies to us.
Once you get comfortable with masturbating by hand, then you can move on to the toys. They’re lots of fun and can help give your orgasm a kick by intensifying them, as well as letting you feel different types of orgasms.
For those of you who don’t know, all orgasms are not alike. Orgasms by oral sex feel different than orgasms from intercourse, etc.
Still not convinced that you should masturbate?
Here’s something I’m sure a lot of people don’t know: As I stated in “Here I Cum”, only a reported 30% of woman can achieve orgasm from penetration alone, and I’m damn near certain that the number is much lower then that. Meaning that the only way a woman can reach orgasm is by stimulating the clitoris either by doing it herself or having her partner do it.
Here’s the thing: Masturbation increases fertility. Sound crazy? Let me explain. A female orgasm serves two purposes, not including pleasure:
1. When a female has an orgasm, the conditions of her vagina and cervix change making it more favorable for implantation to occur during intercourse.
2. During an orgasm, the female’s lower pelvis region begins to contract, thus pulling the sperm towards the cervix which, once again, leads to a higher chance of becoming pregnant.
So if you’re a woman who is trying to become pregnant, then you might want to start exercising your hand on your clitoris.
As you can see, masturbation serves more purposes then you were probably even aware of. The bottom line is, no matter how you word it: Masturbation is Fundamental. So go out and masturbate today!
Masturbation should not be considered shameful or dirty, rather it should be taught as a part of normal human sexuality.
Some people might be shocked to learn that children as young as 2-years-old begin to experiment with masturbation. They might not realize what they are doing at the moment, but they know that it makes them feel good which is why they continue to do it. That is until the parent catches onto the behavior and reprimands them for doing it.
This is a bad approach since by reprimanding the child it will only teach them to be ashamed and uncomfortable of their bodies. It is better to explain to the child that that kind of behavior should only be done in the privacy of their bedrooms as opposed to them doing it in public.
This way, they won’t feel ashamed of themselves, and will know that it is okay as long as it’s done in private.
The first time I can recall masturbating was when I was about 3-years-old. I remember grinding with my cabbage patch and how good it felt. I did this pretty often and it was all innocent. I really didn’t have much of a concept about sexual intercourse. At that age, you don’t really think that way. I was just exploring the tingly feeling that I had down there.
To this day, I don’t see any shame in masturbation. It’s safe, fun and educational.
It’s safe because there are no risks of pregnancy or STD’s and as a bonus, if you happen to get drunk and masturbate, there’s no morning after regrets about who you slept with. Don’t believe that old wives tale. Believe me; you won’t go blind from frequent masturbation. If that were true, I would’ve been blind years ago and I still have 20/20 vision.
It’s fun because you can always guarantee yourself an orgasm, unlike your boyfriend, husband, or that guy you met at the bar last night. Enough said.
Most importantly it’s educational since you’re not only learning your sexual likes and dislikes, but you’re also teaching yourself how to climax, which believe it or not, quite a few woman don’t know how to do.
There are a lot of woman out there who are uncomfortable at the thought, let alone at the actual act of masturbating. For all of those women who feel or think this way I would say, “How can you possibly expect for a man to give you an orgasm if you can’t even give yourself and orgasm?”
Just think about it.
It would put quite a damper on your sex life if you had to fake an orgasm every time you had sex. Sex might feel good without an orgasm, but it’s great with an orgasm. Granted you’d never know what you’re missing if you never had it, but why wouldn’t you want to do something that could make something else even better?
For those women out there who have been contemplating masturbation but haven’t quite worked up the nerve to actually do it, I’d say go for it. After all, what do have to lose?
For those women who are inexperienced at masturbating, I would suggest learning how to climax by hand first before moving onto the toys. This is because it’s a lot harder to learn how to masturbate by hand after using toys to do the job. You tend to become dependant of the toys and won’t learn anything this way. Remember that the whole purpose for masturbation is to learn how to achieve an orgasm by yourself.
Unlike men who are visually stimulated, woman can usually imagine a scenario that will get them off. That’s not to day that men can’t do the same, but they tend to be more visually stimulated by nature and will take longer to climax without the help of a visual aide.
Use any fantasy that you might have (and don’t say you don’t have one because we all do), go lie down and let your imagination and fingers do the work. Stimulation to the clitoris is key to achieving an orgasm. A very common method for masturbation is the “Stop and Go”, which men tend to do frequently. The “Stop and Go” is when you begin to masturbate and when you feel close to orgasm, you stop for a little while, then resume once again. For men, this serves two purposes:
1. It allows them to learn how to control their penis from reaching orgasm/ejaculation too quickly.
2. It makes the orgasm even stronger which in turn enhances the pleasure.
As woman, there’s no such thing as reaching an orgasm to quick (you got to love that part of the double standard), therefore only reason number two of the “Stop and Go” applies to us.
Once you get comfortable with masturbating by hand, then you can move on to the toys. They’re lots of fun and can help give your orgasm a kick by intensifying them, as well as letting you feel different types of orgasms.
For those of you who don’t know, all orgasms are not alike. Orgasms by oral sex feel different than orgasms from intercourse, etc.
Still not convinced that you should masturbate?
Here’s something I’m sure a lot of people don’t know: As I stated in “Here I Cum”, only a reported 30% of woman can achieve orgasm from penetration alone, and I’m damn near certain that the number is much lower then that. Meaning that the only way a woman can reach orgasm is by stimulating the clitoris either by doing it herself or having her partner do it.
Here’s the thing: Masturbation increases fertility. Sound crazy? Let me explain. A female orgasm serves two purposes, not including pleasure:
1. When a female has an orgasm, the conditions of her vagina and cervix change making it more favorable for implantation to occur during intercourse.
2. During an orgasm, the female’s lower pelvis region begins to contract, thus pulling the sperm towards the cervix which, once again, leads to a higher chance of becoming pregnant.
So if you’re a woman who is trying to become pregnant, then you might want to start exercising your hand on your clitoris.
As you can see, masturbation serves more purposes then you were probably even aware of. The bottom line is, no matter how you word it: Masturbation is Fundamental. So go out and masturbate today!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
What are Your Credentials?
Last night, Billy goes to open house at his daughter’s school. For whatever reason, he felt the need to fill me in on the teacher for the new school year. He starts by telling me that she seemed pretty nice and how he liked her because she seemed like a teacher who is passionate about her job.
He goes on to say that the teacher, upon introducing herself, gives the parents in her classroom a little bit of background information about herself. She states that she has been married for 3 years, though she and her husband have been together for a total of 9 years, and is currently pregnant with their first child. She is scheduled to take maternity leave sometime in March. She's been teaching at the school for 8 years, though she only counts 7 since her first year she was working at the school as an intern. She also happed to mention that she had graduated from University of Maryland, and had attained a master’s degree.
Billy turns to me and says, “She seems very educated. What can you say about your credentials?”
I have to admit that I was a little pissed off if not somewhat insulted. I even got that little bubbly feeling in the pit of my stomach. I like referring to it as “The Bad Red Bubbles”, most commonly known a rage.
I mean, even I have to admit that I don’t have the greatest work history. So I thought for a second while I tried to remember all the jobs I had worked in the past and then replied to him, “Well I worked as a cashier for 3 months, I was a waitress for like a week, I work at Old Navy for a day, oh and I worked at Barnes & Nobles for a day, too. I once got hired by Home Depot but I couldn't take the job since at that time I couldn't pass the drug test. I’ve been a stripper, a bartender; I worked as a lifeguard for 3 consecutive summers. I also worked doing that promotional thing, remember? Yeah, I know you remember. I went to hair school for 2 months then dropped out, oh and of course I’ve been working as a phone sex actress for the last year. I have a fucking Associates degree from a god damn shitty ass community college that ain’t even worth the fucking paper it’s printed on, so there you go! There go my fucking credentials!”
How you like them credentials, jackass?!
Of course Billy tried to cover his ass by claiming that he didn’t mean it like that, but then again, who really wants to admit to just being an asshole?
But I guess Billy can only be Billy. What can you do?
I’ve got shitty credentials, and though I was already well aware of that, Billy, in his Billy-like manner, must’ve felt the need to remind me.
Well, at least I can always work on attaining a higher degree, but Billy… Well Billy’s going to have to deal with paying me a ridiculous amount of child support every month if he doesn’t start learning how to humor me, LOL.
Get your shit together, Billy! Humoring your girlfriend is part of being in a relationship. It’s actually more of a requirement and I don’t think you want to learn what happens to men who don’t learn how to humor their wives or girlfriends. I can guarantee you that it’s not pretty. Now if Billy was smart, he’d make sure to make his way over to the flower shop sometime today to make it up to me.
Guys, make sure you think before you open your stupid little mouths. Billy could’ve honestly made his comment in innocence, but his mistake was telling me all about this teachers high credentials and then asking me for my own, even though he already knew them. And yes, the fact that the teacher was a female did make all the different in the world.
Women don’t like being compared to other woman, that is unless we come out looking better then the other woman. So there’s something for all you men to think about.
He goes on to say that the teacher, upon introducing herself, gives the parents in her classroom a little bit of background information about herself. She states that she has been married for 3 years, though she and her husband have been together for a total of 9 years, and is currently pregnant with their first child. She is scheduled to take maternity leave sometime in March. She's been teaching at the school for 8 years, though she only counts 7 since her first year she was working at the school as an intern. She also happed to mention that she had graduated from University of Maryland, and had attained a master’s degree.
Billy turns to me and says, “She seems very educated. What can you say about your credentials?”
I have to admit that I was a little pissed off if not somewhat insulted. I even got that little bubbly feeling in the pit of my stomach. I like referring to it as “The Bad Red Bubbles”, most commonly known a rage.
I mean, even I have to admit that I don’t have the greatest work history. So I thought for a second while I tried to remember all the jobs I had worked in the past and then replied to him, “Well I worked as a cashier for 3 months, I was a waitress for like a week, I work at Old Navy for a day, oh and I worked at Barnes & Nobles for a day, too. I once got hired by Home Depot but I couldn't take the job since at that time I couldn't pass the drug test. I’ve been a stripper, a bartender; I worked as a lifeguard for 3 consecutive summers. I also worked doing that promotional thing, remember? Yeah, I know you remember. I went to hair school for 2 months then dropped out, oh and of course I’ve been working as a phone sex actress for the last year. I have a fucking Associates degree from a god damn shitty ass community college that ain’t even worth the fucking paper it’s printed on, so there you go! There go my fucking credentials!”
How you like them credentials, jackass?!
Of course Billy tried to cover his ass by claiming that he didn’t mean it like that, but then again, who really wants to admit to just being an asshole?
But I guess Billy can only be Billy. What can you do?
I’ve got shitty credentials, and though I was already well aware of that, Billy, in his Billy-like manner, must’ve felt the need to remind me.
Well, at least I can always work on attaining a higher degree, but Billy… Well Billy’s going to have to deal with paying me a ridiculous amount of child support every month if he doesn’t start learning how to humor me, LOL.
Get your shit together, Billy! Humoring your girlfriend is part of being in a relationship. It’s actually more of a requirement and I don’t think you want to learn what happens to men who don’t learn how to humor their wives or girlfriends. I can guarantee you that it’s not pretty. Now if Billy was smart, he’d make sure to make his way over to the flower shop sometime today to make it up to me.
Guys, make sure you think before you open your stupid little mouths. Billy could’ve honestly made his comment in innocence, but his mistake was telling me all about this teachers high credentials and then asking me for my own, even though he already knew them. And yes, the fact that the teacher was a female did make all the different in the world.
Women don’t like being compared to other woman, that is unless we come out looking better then the other woman. So there’s something for all you men to think about.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Angry Girlfriends Guide to the Female Orgasm
The secret to a woman’s orgasm is something that has eluded men, (and yes, even some women) for centuries.
Unlike a man’s sexual organ, a woman’s sexual organ is concealed. This could be part of the reason why the female orgasm has been so elusive to so many. With a penis, it’s all out there in the open. No secret tricks. You know exactly what you’re dealing with, and how to handle it.
I should probably point out that ejaculating and an orgasm are not the same, contrary to popular beliefs.
Ejaculation is when fluid is discharged from a penis (semen) or vagina (the exact source of what fluid is ejaculated from a woman’s vagina is still being debated).
For a man, ejaculation is usually accompanied by an orgasm, although it is possible for a man to ejaculate without having and orgasm and vise versa.
For woman, ejaculation is usually caused by pressure applied to the g-spot which is located in the front vaginal wall, and in my personal experience, there’s about a 50/50 chance that an orgasm will soon follow.
An orgasm is the intense feeling of physical pleasure that is caused by muscle contractions in the lower pelvis region.
So now that we have those basic definitions covered, onto the topic at hand: The female orgasm and how to achieve it.
The simplest way to for a female to achieve an orgasm is by stimulating the clitoris. Sorry to break it to you guys, but all that thrusting in and out, really doesn’t do much for us. Don’t get me wrong. It feels great and all, but truth be known, only about 30% of woman can achieve and orgasm through penetration alone, though I believe it to be much less then that.
So how do you create that stimulation that we need to climax?
Well, oral sex is always a plus. Most women enjoy the feeling of cunnilingus and chances are she will be more then happy to reciprocate the favor to a man with a gifted tongue.
Hand jobs are also a great way to stimulate the clitoris, though I should remind you that focus should be kept on the clitoris. We do enjoy fingering, but that alone isn’t going to get us to climax. Think clitoris.
Rubbing on the clitoris during intercourse will also get the job done and is much appreciated. Some woman, if not shy, will also be more then happy to masturbate themselves while you guys do the thrusting.
Now there is one loophole to having a woman achieve orgasm through penetration which doesn’t involve anything other then a good hard dick: woman on top, also known as riding.
When a woman is riding a man, friction between the clitoris and the man’s pubic hair will normally cause enough stimulation to the clitoris for a woman to achieve orgasm (and I bet you guys thought that your pubic hairs served no purpose).
So guys, trim. Don’t shave. We need your pubic hairs.
Follow these simple rules and you can almost rest assure that we didn't fake an orgasm. And no matter what you think, believe me, you really can't tell whether or not we faked it because we're just that good at it.
Unlike a man’s sexual organ, a woman’s sexual organ is concealed. This could be part of the reason why the female orgasm has been so elusive to so many. With a penis, it’s all out there in the open. No secret tricks. You know exactly what you’re dealing with, and how to handle it.
I should probably point out that ejaculating and an orgasm are not the same, contrary to popular beliefs.
Ejaculation is when fluid is discharged from a penis (semen) or vagina (the exact source of what fluid is ejaculated from a woman’s vagina is still being debated).
For a man, ejaculation is usually accompanied by an orgasm, although it is possible for a man to ejaculate without having and orgasm and vise versa.
For woman, ejaculation is usually caused by pressure applied to the g-spot which is located in the front vaginal wall, and in my personal experience, there’s about a 50/50 chance that an orgasm will soon follow.
An orgasm is the intense feeling of physical pleasure that is caused by muscle contractions in the lower pelvis region.
So now that we have those basic definitions covered, onto the topic at hand: The female orgasm and how to achieve it.
The simplest way to for a female to achieve an orgasm is by stimulating the clitoris. Sorry to break it to you guys, but all that thrusting in and out, really doesn’t do much for us. Don’t get me wrong. It feels great and all, but truth be known, only about 30% of woman can achieve and orgasm through penetration alone, though I believe it to be much less then that.
So how do you create that stimulation that we need to climax?
Well, oral sex is always a plus. Most women enjoy the feeling of cunnilingus and chances are she will be more then happy to reciprocate the favor to a man with a gifted tongue.
Hand jobs are also a great way to stimulate the clitoris, though I should remind you that focus should be kept on the clitoris. We do enjoy fingering, but that alone isn’t going to get us to climax. Think clitoris.
Rubbing on the clitoris during intercourse will also get the job done and is much appreciated. Some woman, if not shy, will also be more then happy to masturbate themselves while you guys do the thrusting.
Now there is one loophole to having a woman achieve orgasm through penetration which doesn’t involve anything other then a good hard dick: woman on top, also known as riding.
When a woman is riding a man, friction between the clitoris and the man’s pubic hair will normally cause enough stimulation to the clitoris for a woman to achieve orgasm (and I bet you guys thought that your pubic hairs served no purpose).
So guys, trim. Don’t shave. We need your pubic hairs.
Follow these simple rules and you can almost rest assure that we didn't fake an orgasm. And no matter what you think, believe me, you really can't tell whether or not we faked it because we're just that good at it.
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