I've been pretty stressed out lately since the bitch, who's face resembles a horrific, mutilated and mauled vagina has been harassing me. But I can't sit here and play the victim because I been giving it right back to her.
I'm determined to one day anally penetrate her with a strap-on, as I'm sure she would like it, being the whore that she is.
Anyways, I'm not gonna waste anymore time blogging about cunt sucking whores, who think they run shit, when in fact they don't, not to mention her vaginal secretions leave a horrible stench on an unsuspecting victims bed sheets (or so I've heard).
But enough about that. Think happy thoughts.
So the weather is changing, and it's getting cold outside.
You know what that means? An increase in unexpected pregnancies.
You know how it goes. It starts getting cold outside, so all you want to stay shacked up as much as possible. You drink a little liquor to keep you warm and then... BAAAAM... You're knocked up and trying to figure out, "How the hell did that happen?"
I'm sure by the holidays, at least one person you know, if not more, will call you with the news that they're knocked up. And though some of them might try to pretend that it was planned, you can almost guarantee that if the couple conceived sometime in the winter, it wasn't.
Of course, this little rule doesn't apply to gay couples.
So the bottom line is, friends don't let friends drink and shack up in the winter with out the proper supervision. Then again, that could just lead to a massive orgy and, well, that's a whole different subject that I'm not gonna touch, at least not today.