Why Call Centers Shouldn't Be Based in India

Lately, I’ve been receiving calls at all weird hours of the night. If I were still working in the phone sex industry this would’ve been normal, but I’ve been out of that game for several months now.

The calls always show up as being “Out Of Area” on the caller ID, which just further annoys me and I never bother to answer the phone. Last night, curiosity must’ve kicked in. At 12:47 AM, I get a call. So I finally answer.

On the other end of the line is a woman speaking broken English. It didn’t take me long to realize that she was calling from one of those fucking call centers in India and was trying to sell me something.

I couldn’t understand a damn thing that she was saying, but whatever the hell she was calling for, I knew I wasn’t interested and certainly not at almost 1 o’clock in the morning. What was I doing up that late on a Tuesday night is completely irrelevant.

For all they could’ve known I could’ve been having some of the wildest, craziest, kinkiest sex on the planet, not that I would’ve bothered to answered the phone if I was, but the sound of the phone ringing at the exact moment that I could’ve potentially been having a mind blowing orgasm could’ve really killed the mood.

Anyways, I asked the Indian bitch where she was calling from, and of course the answer was “I am calling from India, ma’am”. No surprise there.

I asked her if she had any idea what time it was where she was calling to, to which she replied, “My records state that you are in California”. (Imagine that being said in broken English).

I told her that she was wrong and explained that I was on the east coast and that there is a 3 hour time difference between California and where I am located, in which my time zone is 3 hours ahead of California. Not that it really makes much of a difference, since it still would’ve been around 9:47 PM in California time, and I’m sure anyone that would’ve answered over there would’ve been pissed off to have a telemarketer calling so late just the same.

She replied, “I’m very sorry, ma’am. Would you like to hear about...?”

I cut her off right there. Did she really think that she was gonna get away with trying to sell me something after I had just told her it was almost 1 AM?

“No, bitch. Didn’t I just tell you that it’s fucking one o’clock in the morning? I don’t give a shit about what the fuck your selling”, I said to her then I hung up.

I ran straight to the computer after that, and signed my phone number up for the Do Not Call Registry. Hopefully that’ll solve that problem and if not, then I guess I’m about to take “Cursing out Telemarketers Who Don’t Have a Clue About What Time it is In Another Country” as a second hobby.