Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Angry Girlfriends Guide to Preventing Spunky Sperm

To spit or to swallow? Many girlfriends and wives (and yes, boyfriends, too), contemplate this question. We’ve all heard so many rumors about what semen is suppose to taste like, but sometimes when we get right down to it, we encounter a problem: Spunky Sperm.

Let me set up a scenario for you:

You and your partner are getting down and dirty. You are on the receiving end of getting one of the best blow jobs you could ever imagine. The head of your penis begins to swell and you bust a big fat load into your partner’s mouth. To your surprise, she doesn’t pull back at first, but then she makes this face of disgust and hauls ass to the bathroom were you can here her spitting in the sink and vigorously rinsing her mouth.

If this has happened to you, I hate to be the bearer or bad news, but simply put: You have Spunky Sperm.

The semen of each male naturally has a unique taste to it, but believe it or not, what a man eats does affect the way his sperm will taste and even smell. In this guide, I will give you tips on how to prevent the occurrence of Spunky Sperm.

First, let’s cover what foods and drinks create the taste of Spunky Sperm:

As a general rule, dairy products create the spunkiest of Spunky Sperm.

Hot and spicy foods as well as spices with high sulfur content such as garlic and onion can also create a very Spunky Sperm.

Vegetables that should be avoided include broccoli, asparagus and any other cabbage family vegetables.

These types of food should be avoided at all cost before oral sex, unless you get a kick out of watching your partner gagging while hauling ass to the bathroom to spit out that Spunky Sperm that you shot out in her mouth.

On to the neutral food groups:

Foods like meat and fish can go either way. Some woman claim that it helps neutralize Spunky Sperm and others claim that these foods cause Spunky Sperm. The best way to know which way which side of the fence you’re on is to simply just try it for yourself.

Now, onto the foods that help reduce the taste of Spunky Sperm and in most cases, even give semen a pleasant taste:

Fruits such as mangos, pineapples, apples, grapes and melons, give semen a sweeter taste because they are high in natural sugars.

Cinnamon, lemon and peppermint also give semen a sweeter taste.

Parsley and wheatgrass are foods that have also been proven to give semen a sweeter taste.

Drinking lots of water will help reduce the taste of semen altogether, though there will still be a slight taste.

Fruity alcohol based drinks and drinks like cream soda give a sweet sugary taste and is highly recommended in my book.

Guys, if you follow these guidelines, you’ll increase the chances of your partner wanting to swallow almost every time!


TA said...

I liked the advise about the creme soda. it worked great! thanx

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