Frijolero: The Evil Bastard

So we all know that I have big birthday plans for this coming weekend. Well maybe not BIG, but it's in the works.

For over 2 months, I've been drilling Frijolero to make sure he took off Friday.

I mean I have really made every attempt to make sure that I have really drilled it into that little evil bastards head that I wanted him to not work on Friday.

I didn't have an exact plan on what we were going to do, but all the same, he needed to be off on Friday, May 22, 2009.

I don't know how much more clear I could've made this.

I thought I had actually gotten through to the fucking asshole since he had told me that he had gone ahead and gotten the day off, especially because he knew how important it was for him to go to the DMV to register my car, especially because this is my birthday weekend and we would definitely need a car with legal tags.

My tags are suspended yet again and instead of removing the tint (which is only part of the reason why my tags are suspended...), he figured, YES HE AND NOT ME, suggested that we just register the car under his name and then all my little problems would go away. But that's another story for another day.

The point is that it was crucial for him to take the day off for this to get done as it would effect the rest of my weekend. My birthday weekend.

Today, about 3 hours ago, to be exact, I get the news that that fucking jackass has once again screwed me.

He's not taking the day off and I'm not going to have my car registered which means I have no car to go and do all the fantastic and wonderful things that I haven't quite planned yet, but that's not the fucking point.

In a moment of hope, I had figured that all had not been lost and I could rent a car for the weekend. That is, until I called up like 20 different car rental places and they were all out of cars because it's Memorial Day weekend... (The economy can't be that fucking bad..)

That fucking beaner has fucked me yet again.

He has fucked many of my plans in the past.

Once, when I was pregnant, a friend of mine had suggested that we do a couples trip and go to the beach. Her and her man, and me and that evil bastard, Frijolero.

Frijolero had agreed to the plans and I went ahead and booked the hotel. Two days before our trip, he cancelled the reservation. Why? Cause he's an asshole.

Mind you, I was fucking pregnant. I only acted like it was the end of the world cause in my delicate state, it sure as hell did feel like it was.

Two years ago, the same friend suggest another attempt at a trip to the beach. Once again we go ahead and make the reservations. I was sure there was no way in hell he'd screw me again, but sure enough, day before the trip, that fucking jackass of a beaner fucks me again, canceling the trip and that time, I lost the money from the reservation.

You starting to see a pattern here?

So what is the lesson learned here?

You can't trust a fucking beaner!

Ok, maybe that's a little unfair to say...

But I'm definitely gonna fuck his ass over when it's his birthday... Oh wait... I already have plans... It's Angry Girlfriend Day on October 15th.

I'm gonna be getting drunk and throwing darts at pictures of fucking face!

Take that, asshole!!!

And by the way, I'm not fucking negative... You're just a jackass!!!

OMG... I Can't Fucking Stand You

I can't stand Frijolero. Everything about him fucking irritates me.

Like yesterday for example, I was trying to have a conversation with his dumb ass on the phone but apparently it was a one sided conversation with me talking to myself as he flirted with some beaner cashier at some beaner bodega.

Here I was in the middle of a self revelation that I had just encountered, and the fucking fucktard can't even keep his fucking penis in check long enough for me to finish a god damn sentence.

Then there was the day before yesterday when the fucker swore up and down that I was pregnant and made my by a pregnancy test for his own piece of mind I suppose.

I kept trying to tell him, I'm having bad allergies. I got some shit going on with my sinuses. Not to mention that I had just gotten off my period last week and I'm pretty in fucking tune with my body to know what the fuck is going on in there.

Of course it came out negative and there was never a doubt in my head to begin with.

But hey, what the fuck would I know? I've only been living in the same body for the last 27 years so I guess I'm not qualified enough to know what goes on in there.

I am only the queen on mother fucking self diagnosing and self medicating, but I guess I don't know shit about myself.

Fucking waste of $15.

Ahhhhhhhhh... Well, now that I've got that out, I feel a little better...

Fuck! Shit! Cunt! Fucker! Sock monkey!

Ok... Now I feel better...