Say Whaat?

So... four hours later, and I have nothing better to do, then post another blog about my bowel movements.

That is, I was about to take another shit, for like the 10th time today, until this spic lady came knocking at the door. Actually, thats not even relevant to anything.

Then again, maybe it is. She complemented me on my newly, blue-dyed hair, but something tells me that bitch is sneaky and is up to something. Actually, I'm just assuming that she's sneaky cause she's a wetback. You know her ass has crossed a few borders, illegally.

Once again, this is all really not relevant to anything.

I've noticed that its usually harder for me to focus on any particular subject when I'm on my period, which is why I tend not to write anything when I am on my period. I got shit for brains right about now and I'm basically rambling on about absolutely nothing.

You still with me?

Doesn't matter, I'll still ramble on...

So my new project song will be called "The Slut Song". It'll go something like this:

I'm a slut and you're a slut
So lets all fuck
Right up the butt

I like sex right on the grass
and you like sex right up your ass

Lets fuck
Lets suck
Lets do it rough
It's fun
I'm done
So hurry, cum

Anyways, it's a work in progress. And now I'm off to the can... again...

Shout Out From the Bathroom

Sometimes I think that some of the people in my family are probably just as crazy, if not crazier then me.

Take my cousin, Solay Amor, for example. She's cool. Love her crazy ass to death. Much like my cousin, Jersey, she's also a lesbian (we have a few of those among other things).

She recently posted a video on MySpace entitled Showing Some Love, which I think should more appropriately be entitled, Shout Out From the Bathroom.

It's a pretty simple video with a clear message: I'm in the bathroom cause I have no where else to record in privacy and I'm giving a shout out to all my peeps in MIA.

I gotta admit though, for a Shout Out From the Bathroom, she sure does look good.

I'm thinking that she should do more Shout Out From the Bathroom videos and make it into a whole series.

Shout Out From the Bathroom, starring Solay Amor. She could like bring people in for interviews. Or maybe just interview one of her turds floating around in the toilet.

"So today, we're gonna have a sit down with Popcorn Shit, who is most notable for resembling seeds of popcorn and making you push with more effort then all of the other shits, only to have one lonely popcorn shaped shit come out".

Maybe she'll invite me as a guest star and I can come on the show and sing The Diarrhea Song.

She could be like the next Tila Tequila, only not Asian, or a model... or bisexual, and no musical talent... wait... Tila Tequila doesn't have any musical talent. What the hell was I thinking? (Tila, I love your show and your personality, and you do have a bangin' ass body, but c'mon, let's be real).

I am so totally off subject now...

Anyways, keep an eye out for more Shout Out From the Bathroom videos, or maybe not. Whatever. I'll keep you all posted.

Any of you people try to steal this idea and I'll sue you like I'm gonna sue those bastards from Kelloggs for stealing my Evil Poptart Cartoon. Fucking assholes.